Crush

220px-crush_strawberry_soda_austin_calhoon_photograph

Because I was not allowed to have a boyfriend in school and college, I had quite an emotionally stable life. Come to think of it, not being in a relationship had been a bliss actually. But then, I had my share of crushes so to say. This guy, lets name him ‘M’ ,was in my class with same elective as mine so we almost attended all our classes together except the practicals. Even though , having an affair was a strict no-no from mom, I thought , having a crush was not a big deal as it did not have any strings and also mom would never come to know about it!

Slowly but steadily, the crush was getting harder and one of my closest friend decided to take some charge. She asked one of the other guys to ask M if he had a girlfriend and that I liked him. I was not very happy with this situation now because this was being forced on me and I was kinda happy in my cocoon and really didn’t want to know if M was interested in me or not. Also, M was quite oblivious of my feelings for him and I didn’t want to jeopardize , whatever minimum talking terms that we were on.

Anyways, the news reached me in a week , that M had a girlfriend already, back in his hometown and hence no further questions were asked. It would take quite a few days for me to come out of coma and I felt terribly guilty. Guilty of god knows what….! For the rest of the semesters, I chose not to tell any of my friends about anything personal and of course the equations with M changed for the rest of the years in the university. I avoided to look at M or talk to him anytime during the classes and non-class times that we classmates would get together.

About 12 years later I met almost all my school mates and college-mates on FB except M. It would take another 9 years for M to get into FB.

Just a couple of months back, one day I was looking through the probable friends FB suggests and when I found M’s profile in it, I found myself smiling. Since there were no pictures in the profile, I sent a message asking if he was the same guy that was in my college. In the reply , M just said yes and that he was roll number 54. Well, after a few weeks , he uploaded some pictures of him and his family on his account for all to see.

I was horrified to see what had become of a handsome lad in a span of 20 years. Here was a middle aged stout man with a beer belly ,his hair was all orange because of henna and I assumed it must have all gone grey and I was staring at a face which looked about 20 years more older than our age. I could not sleep that night…wondering about what must have gone through his life that he grew old so fast. Then I wondered , if I have also grown that old….then I also wondered why was I wondering about him. I had always maintained that age was just a number and its our attitude which actually matters but a look at M told me , may be it was not the case. I remember seeing him as a 20 year old guy and I saw him now 20 years later, I was ready to see some changes but not such drastic ones. I realized, if we abuse ourselves by smoking or drinking or by taking too much stress , it does take away years out of our lives. One has to keep fit and make sure we rally against nature by staying fit and happy.

M looked old to me that day and I felt as if I was looking at some ancient temple in Bali. In a flash, I was in the morning classes when I used to look at him during the first class of the day and felt cheerful for the rest of the week!! As I smiled and remembered the old times,I  took my jacket out for my evening 5 km walk.

Bali- Google images

Bali- Google images

 

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He and She

fat-duck

He loved spicy food and she loved non-veg. He loved romantic Bollywood numbers from the 70’s, she loved random stuff. He was fond of business news and she loved cricket. He valued family relationships outside the immediate family too, she was born and brought up in a nuclear family. He loved home made food because he had lived on ordered food for a long time, she loved to go out and very often because she gave food ratings on a regular basis for restaurants. He was a health freak, she loved to eat, read, sleep and repeat. They were poles apart in diversities yet they clicked. Or so they thought. Opposites do attract but not necessarily for longer periods in time.

They had met on internet when it was new. Just chat and mails in those times. They grew fond of each other over next 5 years. Little did they realized that the charm was superficial. It was mostly because they were still in college and were not committed to anyone else at that point in time. Coming from different religious and ethnic backgrounds, their relationship was doomed from day one. But they managed to overlook the red signals, defied their common sense and went against their families.

The marriage went kaput in just a couple of months. They realized it soon but they dragged it for a year somehow. She took a decision to pursue her studies instead and he took a travelling job and a transfer to another city.

Rest is history.

Lesson learnt from other’s mistake: Do not jump into a relationship just because you are single and never take your marriage for granted.

Duck-Amazing

PS- He loved being with nature, she loved being inside her cozy room, reading and cooking!

The Roseman Bridge

 

                                                                      Caught N’ Shot- A&R

It was after lunch and Francesca sat on the porch sipping iced tea.With Richard gone for more than a decade, thoughts about Robert came to her mind more frequently.As a usual chore,she got dressed up for her walk to the middle river across the Roseman bridge. After the walk she would pick vegetables from her garden and cook while listening to radio. Then she would read all the letters she wrote to Robert.
She stopped her car about a mile away from the bridge and started to walk. As the gravel road turned, the bridge started to appear.The memories of that sultry August afternoon started to flash in front of her eyes. It seemed just like yesterday, when she had come here with Robert .It was a good 15 miles from her home nevertheless she was glad she took the decision.
Today she saw a truck parked by the side of the road. Her eyes danced like butterflies all around.It would be stupid to look for Robert after so long, she thought. But she had kept his memories alive in her heart.She almost ran towards the bridge, when she saw a figure leaning over the railings, looking down at the River.She felt like this person had been standing there since eternity.Francesca called out his name and he looked back. He was an older, frailer version of her tall and husky Robert.
He smiled and looked for her hand. As she moved a step closer to hold him, he murmured,”I knew you would come” .Closing her eyes she hugged him tight and said.”Let’s go home Robert…”

Alter Ego

purple-flowers

“I’m sorry , I will not do it again….I want to have kids with you…come back home please…” Hopelessly, she had said on the mail. She had finally realized, it was their last fight and she gave her last shot. He didn’t bother to reply to this mail either like all of her previous mails and texts. He had enough of it already.
Last year when they were at her place and had an argument she had slapped him hard on his face, in front of her parents. That was the last bit of humiliation he could take. He remembered how he loved her truly and had married her in spite of everyone in his family being against it. He stood by her in her difficult times. Was she worth it, at all ?
The boarding had been announced and he smiled as he took out his boarding pass. He was leaving for Turkey and this time never to come back.

DSC04833

The Other Woman

Love

Love

How does it feel like to be the other woman? To be the woman who broke a marriage of two years. Well, there is always another side to a story…!

Initially Ria started spending only evenings with Andy. Soon she started staying over weekends and then before they realised, it was the entire week. Andy seemed to be in pain, a lot of pain. He said that he recently had a break up with his girlfriend and it had caused him lot of heartache. Ria did everything to ease him out. He was fine a few months later and thats when he confided about his marriage which had broken down. Ria loved him even more. She made sure they were together all the hours after work.He would see her off for work everyday and anxiously wait for her return after a tiring day at work. Together they made several escapades to nearby places, discovering and knowing these places and also each other. All this while, Ria was kind of worried how would they ever end their marriages and subsequently be with each other. Andy , on the other hand was more of a “live-in-present” kind of a guy. He was soaking up each moment of happiness that he could get from life.

Ria sometimes wondered why there were so few calls from Andy’s wife over the week or even on weekends for that matter. How can a newly married couple live so far away  from each other in different cities with almost no communications, she would wonder.  When a guy does not respond to his wife’s calls, texts, mails….there is nothing much left in the marriage.

Somtimes Ria would feel guilty about being the other woman. She could feel that Andy’s wife was still trying to save their marriage. But without his help, it was an impossible task. He had gone far away from her, their home for 1 year and her food that she so felt had captivated him. After all  a marriage is supposed to make you feel secured, comforted and loved. All thse 2 years, Andy had felt none. In fact , he asked Ria why women change after marriage. She said yes they do, only they start loving their men more, his eyes had glistened.

Ria told Andy to give one last chance to his marriage. She didnt want to be that “other woman” and she also felt, the wife was still trying to be with him as much as possible, of course when she would get time from her studies, her friends, her parents and her hobbies. Andy was never her first priority after marriage. And that was precisely why the marriage had started to crumble. She visited him once a year and would join him for Diwali when he went to his parental house. All the other inbetween months , Andy was supposed to be happy, in love with her, be faithful to her and believe in their long distance marriage and be all by himself.

It was a October that year, when his wife stayed with him in their house, went to his parents house with him and then came back with him for a few more days. Ria does not know what went on between them during those days. But Andy would call her every night and tell her that he loved her. After another couple of months, Andy was on his way out to another job assignment in US, he stopped by her city and stayed with her for a few days.  He confided that he has given his last shot and it didn’t work. That he is done and its not going to work and that he wants to stay with her rest of his life.

After this , it was just them. They still didnt know how would they go about their respective divorces nonetheless it was quite a relief for Ria that she gave Andy some time to decide. Ria now knows how Andy’s marriage had already disintegrated when she came into his life and that she never forced him for any of his decisions.

Truth is , a marriage cannot be broken down if there isnt any crack in it. Ria also feels that Andy’d wife had left him alone to fetch for himself. He had instead fetched- a girl who loved him just a bit more and never took him for granted.

In such cases , the wife was, in fact the other woman who had taken so many years of their lives before the actual soulmates could live happily ever after.

Sometimes we need to change our perceptions, those which are created by society.

Hope

Hope

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